forgiveness (doesn't always solve our problems)
by Someone aka Me
Summary: Percy keeps trying to make the right choices. But it never goes the way he intends. / The battle of Hogwarts, from Percy's POV.


Assignment 9: Geography **Task 1:** Write about someone falling out of favour with their superiors

…

In the end, the choice is easy.

Percy has been thinking about it for a long time.

If he's honest with himself, he's been thinking about it since Voldemort rose and he had to face the truth that he was wrong.

But he's never been good at admitting he's wrong.

Especially not like this. Not when he walked away from everything he had — his family, the two men who loved him — all because he believed that the Minister was doing what was right.

But by the time that Percy can admit maybe it's time to make amends, Fudge is long since gone and he doesn't know if he'll even be welcomed back anymore.

He knows they see it as a betrayal. Both his family, and Oliver and Cedric. He told them they were wrong and walked away.

He chose loyalty to his job over loyalty to those he loved because he thought it was what was right.

He's pretty sure it wasn't.

He's been thinking for a long time about how to make things right, as the world gets darker and colder. As they bring in Muggleborns and force them to register, to _prove_ their right to magic.

He's pretty sure the Ministry is nothing more than a puppet show, strings pulled by Lord Voldemort himself, and Percy hates being a part of that, but he doesn't know how to leave without making himself a target. Without increasing the target on his family's backs.

Until he's sitting at his desk listening to one of his coworkers tell another, "Tim met a girl last night," and wishing he were anywhere else when everything changes.

A giant silvery hawk soars into the room and says in a voice he could never mistake, "This is the moment to choose. Abe's."

The timing feels like serendipity.

Percy wants to cry at the sound of Oliver's voice.

He wants to cry at the hand outstretched in an offering of forgiveness, and olive branch he never expected to receive.

Instead, he starts to stride out of the room, headed for the Apparition point. He doesn't hesitate.

He's not going to screw this up again.

He is stopped by the voice of Dolores Umbridge — a voice he's grown to hate — calling after him.

"And where do you think you're going?"

"I'm leaving," he says without turning around. He doesn't want to give anything away if the MInistry doesn't already know. Not that he knows much. Oliver's message was deliberately vague.

"It is the middle of the work day! You are not ill, and you will stay at your post."

Percy turns to face her. Her complexion is rage-flushed, her features cast in anger.

"Pardon me," he says. "I have about a month of vacation days at this point. I'll be taking them now. All of them."

She sputters. "It's the middle of the day! And you haven't put in a request!"

Percy doesn't have time for this bullshit. He tips his head at her. "Maybe I don't care."

He turns around and begins walking.

"If you walk out that door, you're fired!"

Percy pushes open the door, calls out, "I think I'll resign!" and lets the door slam shut behind him.

It feels so final.

He wonders if he'll have cause to regret that.

He thinks about Oliver's voice saying _this is the moment to choose_ with a grave sort of finality and he thinks maybe he won't.

This is the end. Either way.

It sounds like a final stand, like an ultimatum.

Like the kind of thing where they either find victory or they die.

Either way, he's probably not coming in to work tomorrow.

He sighs, takes a deep breath, and Apparates towards Hogsmeade.

…

The tunnel from the Hog's Head to Hogwarts is long and winding and gives Percy too much time to think.

To wonder if this is the right thing.

But then he stumbles out of the portrait at the end of the hall and his family are there, all of them, together, and his mother cries and they welcome him with open arms and Percy feels like the first day of spring when the sun is peering out from behind the clouds and there's warmth in the air that seeps deep into his bones.

"I'm sorry," he says over and over. "I'm sorry." Because he's been thinking it for years and now he has a chance to say it.

And his mother hugs him tightly and says, "We're so glad you're here."

…

He doesn't get a chance to find Oliver or Cedric because suddenly everything is happening all at once and it feels like the whole world is caving in, shaking at the foundations.

And then there's Thicknesse and Percy is joking about resigning and Fred is laughing and then the whole world goes slow and cold and still too fast because Fred is _dead_.

Fred is dead and it's Percy's fault.

He should never have come back.

And he's shaking and he the world is crashing back in on him and he doesn't have time to stop because the world is still turning and people are still fighting and it feels impossible because _don't they know that Fred is dead_?

He can't think. He can barely see, and he can't tell if it's from rock dust in his eyes or tears and he doesn't get a chance to find out before everything is grinding to a shuddering, ragged halt because Voldemort is talking to them, telling them that Harry Potter will come to them, telling them to collect their dead and Percy falls to his knees and he doesn't know if he'll ever get back up again.

Except that then Oliver and Cedric are there, both of them standing over him, helping him to his feet and he's sagging into Cedric and Oliver is wrapping his arms around them both and it feels like a balm over a wound that's still torn ragged.

Time skips, and he's in the Great Hall staring at the body of his little brother and he doesn't know what to feel.

He feels cold.

He feels numb.

He feels shattered.

George's face is the picture of defeat, the quintessential image of a broken man and Percy thinks, _that, too, is my fault_.

He thinks, _I should not have come_.

And they are not given enough time to grieve because The Voldemort is coming back bearing the body of their strongest hope for redemption, but he underestimates them. They are not his followers. They are no one's followers. They are strongest when they are together but they are not a figurehead, they are a body of rebels each with their own cause to fight for. Losing Harry is a blow but it's not a loss.

But then Harry is back and then Voldemort is dead and everything is over.

But Fred is still dead.

Oliver and Cedric are there, at his sides as he stares at the broken body of his little brother. There are arms around him and he's glad he's not alone but it doesn't help, not in the end.

He is forgiven, but that doesn't make up for the fact that he's the reason Fred is dead.

Maybe he shouldn't be forgiven.

* * *

Writing Month: 1211

Moresome: plot point: a fight. Word count: 1211

Character Appreciation: 6. word: victory

Disney: 5. The Hyenas - Write about someone turning on their leader. (10 Points if you don't use Snape)

Book Club: Joe: (relationship) brothers; (action) fighting; (dialogue) "[Name] met a girl last night."

Showtime: 32. The Final Battle - (year) 1998

Days: Visit Your Relatives Day - Write about a familial reunion

Lyric Alley: 13. And the only solution was to stand and fight

Sophie's Shelf: 1. Stefano: Write about someone who isn't safe.

Cooking: Onion: genre: angst

Chocolate Frogs:5. (Bronze): Wainscott: Challenge: Write about dealing with/being one of the injured at the Battle of Hogwarts.

Debate: OT3: word: serendipity

Insane House: word: serendipity


End file.
